Pink & Blue Mummyland

Pink and blue parenting through pink and blue moods….

Conversations with God

on September 30, 2013

Every day I am surprised by God. It might be how He chooses to act in a given situation, or the tiny things He puts in place to see His will fulfilled, or just something He has wonderfully created that I’ve suddenly seen in a new light. And then sometimes, just briefly, I get the privilege of seeing his sense of humour.

A great friend of mine relayed to me the following conversation she’d had with God during a church service last night:
Me: “so God, I’m pretty happy with how I’m at peace with certain stuff”
God: “you do realise that ignoring it isn’t the same as being at peace, right?”
Me: “yeah but it’s fine and it totally works as long as nothing external and outside of my control brings it up……..ah”
God (sympathetically): “did you want to maybe look at that together?”

Isn’t God great? And aren’t we so daft sometimes when it comes to telling Him things? He is so kind, so gentle, and so patient in waiting for us to bring Him the things that hold us back. It amazes me that the God who made the universe and holds the answers to life in His hands, also loves us enough to not only wait for us to come to Him with our concerns and worries, but also let us think that being in communion with Him regarding this issues was somehow our idea.

Yesterday was a dark day for me. The light at the end of the tunnel seemed to be moving faster than I could run, and I didn’t have the energy to keep up the chase. I don’t have enough fingers to count how many shoulders I wept on. But at the same time, I was given little gifts of blessing – hugs and offers of help, encouragement in my gifts, and allowance to not use them for a while. I even had a conversation with someone who knew my diagnosis without me knowing, who talked rationally and non-judgementally and restored my belief that some people do ‘get it’.

As I watched my friend in tears at the feet of her Lord, bringing Him the ‘stuff’ she had been at peace with until moments earlier, I realised that we are never alone. Even on those dark days, God steps in and does something beautiful – painfully beautiful sometimes, but beautiful nonetheless. And I am reminded of something a broken but a wise woman said: Life is never all brutal or all beautiful. It’s both, all the time. Life is brutiful.

Amen, sister – I can’t say it any better than that.

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